“Mangala Holland is a true Tantrika in every sense. Never before have I met a woman with such dedication, passion and reverence for this path. It is such a joy to collaborate and work with her. I can’t recommend her highly enough! If you ever have the opportunity to work with Mangala, or have a 1:1 session with her, grasp it! She is truly incredible, and her depth of knowledge expansive.”
Emma Power, co-founder of Tantra Is Love and founder of The Awaken School
“I’ve attended several of Mangala’s workshops and she is truly amazing! Her energy is divine and she is a wonderful teacher with years of experience to draw on. I highly recommend working with her!”
“I’ve been blessed to have Mangala’s guidance to my own feminine energy through one-to-one sessions and workshops and these meetings have been healing, loving and inspiring. Mangala’s presence will help you to face yourself, what ever it is you need to go through, with lot of love and acceptance.”
“I really felt really welcomed, supported, safe and held all the way through the session….it all felt very natural, and I found it really easy to relax into the session, enjoy it and, especially towards the end, really engage in it.
I had expected to end up blissed out. That’s what you said – and that would have been consistent with my previous experiences with (non-intimate) bodywork. Not this time. As we came back together for the closing ritual, I felt alive, I felt real clarity, and inner power, a sparkle in my eyes and energy in my voice. I’m sure you felt that energy too. I had expected that the session would be about getting to know intimate aspects of my body and physical pleasure. I had no idea how strong this massage would be for shifting and clearing energies that were undermining me.
This energetic shift was so strong that, yesterday (the day after) I was still feeling the energy – when I think back to the session, I still feel the energy in my upper body all over again.
Would I come back for another session? Definitely – once when I’m ready. This was powerful work and I do need time to allow it to really integrate.
“I wanted to share some of my story, how I found Mangala and about my experience with her yoni massage.
I have a history of extensive sexual abuse and conditioning for multiple years of my childhood from a family member. That part I won’t go into detail about here but I will skimp over. From that and violence, always fearing for my life, I formed several mental illnesses from Borderline Personality Disorder to Complex PTSD.
My body and my brain had formed into one dysfunctional pattern. I have suffered through nightmares; flashbacks; violent outbursts; chronic anger; mental breakdowns; self-harm and reactive depression among other things.
Since I was 9 years old I have been to: Psychiatrists; psychologists; clinical psychologists; counsellors; a private psychiatric hospital; life coach; hypnosis; emergency department and mental health ward of my local medical hospital multiple times; I had been given the choice by police officers to be scheduled or go willingly with the ambulance; I have gone through an Apprehended Violence Order which was dropped after a breakdown one Christmas that accidentally lead to a cut on my partner’s leg. I’ve also been to many group therapy circles and will be graduating my longest and most successful one to date, DBT (Dialectical Behaviour Therapy) in a couple of weeks.
I had a phone call from child protection when I was 16 to ask if I wanted to press charges and I said no because I was completely alone, isolated and terrified. … Among other things.
Well, ten years on and having moved out of my parents’ home, with the continued support of my fiancée and our son, having found my conscious spiritual path and continued my work on my mental health and admitted I can no longer work (easily) to give myself a break – I have re-opened the legal proceeding.
I no longer need any medication and I no longer self harm. My sense of self worth is growing rapidly; I am beginning to feel the same person as I was at 5 years old, before the abuse began.
I have been shedding layer after layer ever since I stopped my abuser by my own will power.
I have done everything I can think of to improve my health and my self worth and find my true self, find my identity. Part of that included going to the gym.
Whilst there one day some time ago, I looked over at the TV on the wall from one of the machines and read a news headline: “I paid a therapist to massage my vagina.” I did a double take like “What…?!” When I got home I quickly Googled the headline and there it was – a news article by a lady named Vanessa explaining her yoni massage with Mangala.
I knew instantly that this was for me, and Mangala was the one to do it.
I literally didn’t know anything else but that. I was instantly connected and reached out to Mangala. She promptly responded, saying she’s in Melbourne.
I’m from Sydney, NSW. I have never lived anywhere else and not travelled around Australia much at all.
And yet, this barrier didn’t mean anything.
I knew where my destiny lay.
When my fiancée and I got together some money, we planned our trip to Melbourne. We were sitting in FlightCentre, choosing our hotel and hire car before I even knew where she was based, before I even knew when she was available. I waited for her email to confirm a date and confirmed with the travel agent in the same breath.
It was also my fiancées birthday that week and our son was excited to shop in Melbourne, so we were able to make a vacation out of my vagina massage appointment!
This was all guided by spirit.
I hadn’t even looked up any details about yoni massage beyond what Mangala told me. (I only read one other article the night before)
I was instantly hooked on the idea. After everything I have done to heal, all the effort I have put in, how hard I have had to fight for EVERYTHING – how many layers I have shed, how much I have changed and how rapidly so – this was one of the last doorways to my next level I needed in order to step off my plateau. This was about connecting the scene of the crime to the rest of my body, to re-integrate my physical self to the self who lived purely in my mind and was simply too afraid to reach for my full potential.
This is my destiny.
So at last, I was at the door. Nervous and without much idea of what to expect – yet feeling utterly euphoric about hearing spirit guide me.
She opened the door (Wasn’t as tall as I thought 😛 ) and my whole body just… responded. It was like I was coming back to an old friend I hadn’t seen in forever.
It all felt so normal.
As a review of her practise, everything was absolutely perfect! She is kind; caring; real and honest. She is so connected and utterly timeless. She treated me as the most precious soul in the universe. Just how she would want to treat herself, and how she wants others to treat her. Because she knows and she showed me that all soul is the same soul.
I could hardly believe how much I learned in 2 hours. How much I grew and released. I can still hardly believe it now. I am still shedding; releasing and healing from the initial stages. It’s probably the most difficult stage. I got a cold/virus as all the crap is draining away. It’s exhausting but I am pushing through.
The entire moment felt like everything and nothing all in the same instant. I still revel in the pleasure of it fondly, driven to chase more and find more avenues of fulfilment. I still reflect on the breakthroughs feeling proud and victorious. I still feel the warmth of her guidance and connection and the ecstasy of just instant, pure love. A soul love and a soul type appreciation for my pleasure; my pain and all my release. It was sexual, but not – in the same breath. We were two people and the same person – in the same breath.
I felt my whole life flash before my eyes. (Thank the stars I have had Mindfulness drilled into me these past 12 months) I was able to be totally conscious and connected. I felt all the triggers of the trauma hitting me in waves as we moved to my yoni from the full body. The external was more difficult for me emotionally than the internal at first. (In line with my past experience) And as she began, I felt triggers come and pushed through them – I released them. It was the familiar numbness and tingling through my whole body, the old desire to pull away and hide.
I could not bear to avoid it or ignore it or push it away.
This was my chance and I grabbed it by the horns!
I knew I was safe; cared for and loved. I knew I could break down here. I knew I could feel the familiar fear; numbness; pain and sorrow of my past – forgive it, welcome it and send it on its way. I did not need to hold onto it. She helped me release it. And I did not need to control the triggers or the situation. There was nothing to control, it was all pure perfection.
I looked to the ceiling and saw pure white sheets and light instead of the black void of my history. I watched over her face and felt my fingers on her legs – all grounding me in safety and love.
I didn’t realise how important consent and permission was until she asked me. I thought that by being there, I had consented anyway. Yet, when she asked me every step of the way, I paused – not in hesitation to consent, but in surprise that I was being asked at all! I had forgotten that I could verbally consent. I had forgotten that I could say no. My mind had drifted away from these simple yet powerful facts, that when she asked, she changed my brain mapping! She was in control and yet not. She was guided and I knew it. We were the same being. My soul asked me permission to touch my physical self and it has changed me in that single step alone.
She gave me lots of pleasure before; during and after clearing my most vulnerable points of pain. Yet I needed all of it to bolster me or I doubt I would’ve survived the way I did. She hit one button all the way inside and to the back and I exploded in tears; agony; triggers; fear – I utterly reverted back to my child self, my wounded self, my ego; seeing flashbacks and remembering my whole experience – and in that moment I heard her voice guiding me back. I came out the other end of that tunnel and let it all go. In such a quick moment, I came back to the room and I was changed.
I enjoyed every single moment of this from planning it to chatting afterward – naked, covered in oil in the cosy, warm room. I could’ve lain like that forever. I didn’t want it to end!
The process is perfectly paced and perfectly thought out. I was naked, but I didn’t feel naked. I didn’t feel exposed, I just felt normal.
I have also never peed so hard in my life as hard as I did right after that!
I am also enjoying this moment right now, reflection and sharing. I am already diving head first into my next journeys and wrapping up old ones.
For the first time in my life, I feel my female organs there inside me. I am nurturing them now so that I am reborn and to make things easier for future children I will bear from them.
Again, I can’t thank you enough Mangala. You have given me back to me and we’ve only just begun.”
Tamsin White, Sydney