Shortcut to self-love in 7 easy steps

Happy Woman Smilling

Fall in love with the most important person in the world….you!

Are you looking to attract the perfect partner? Do you suffer with insecurity or fear of rejection? What’s holding you back? For most of us this stems down to one simple fact- we don’t love ourselves enough! The laws of attraction mean that whatever we put out to the world is what we will receive back. And we’ll only receive what we feel worthy of! To attract the most awesome partner, or that dream job, we need to believe in ourselves wholeheartedly, and to love ourselves so completely.  We need to believe in our own awesomeness- it’s that simple!

So why is this so hard? We carry round all these stories from our past, talk to ourselves in certain ways, and behave in patterns that make reinforce the belief that we’re not good enough, that we don’t deserve it. My mum told me when I was 6 that I don’t deserve nice things as I’ll only break them. How deep is this buried in my self conscious? How much other bullshit have I told myself over the years? Every time, pushing this insecurity deeper and deeper!

Here are some super-easy but powerful tips to help you change that mindset. Fill yourself with love, and the universe will reflect it right back at you!

1. Self-talk

What do you say to yourself? I’m an idiot! I always mess up! All the good guys are taken! Try instead- I’m getting better. I’m open to receive, I’m worth it. You’ll soon feel a positive shift.

2. Affirmations

I’m a big believer in telling myself positive statements every day, first thing in the morning and last thing at night. Do them naked in front of a full length mirror for maximum impact!

My favourites are “I love myself unconditionally”, “I am perfect with all my faults”, “God loves me just the way I am” (you can use “Universe” if the G-word triggers you!)

The more you say them, the more they become true J

3. Get into your body!

Put on an exercise DVD, go for a swim, do a bellydance class or just put on some kick-ass tunes and dance around your bedroom (actually this last one works best for me!) Feel how good it is to move, shake it all out, celebrate your physical form, and release all those lovely endorphins that bring on the good vibes

4. Give complements to others.

Tell a friend how good she looks, or what you like most about someone. Even a stranger- spread the love! When we make someone else feel good we get better at allowing ourselves to feel good too. Which brings me to…

5. Learn to receive complements

“What, this old thing?” NO! When you get a complement, say “thank you”, and enjoy it. For many of us this is surprisingly uncomfortable, and takes quite some practice.

6. Nurture yourself every day.

Run a bath with bubbles and lock out the world, lovingly caress yourself in the shower in the morning, meditate for half an hour, treat yourself to a nice lunch or a new pair of shoes, give yourself a breast massage- whatever it is, practice cherishing yourself. You’re special and you deserve it. Make a commitment to do something every day for a month and enjoy it.

 7. Make love with yourself.

This is really important! How can we expect others to know how to turn us on if we haven’t explored ourselves? Set aside an evening for yourself, light candles, put on some nice music and practice self-pleasure (what the Taoists call “self-cultivation”). There’s nothing sexier than a woman who is happy in her own body and in tune with her sexual energy. Read my article “The Art of Self-Pleasure” for more inspiration.

Get my “14 steps to non-stop satisfaction” Ebook for free!

Let’s get it on!

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